I know God is a healer. I believe God is a healer. But I have been praying for months for my dad’s leg to heal and He hasn’t been able to walk well for a long time. There’s a part of my heart that breaks every time he stays strong in his faith that God is going to heal him because of the gap.
I know God restores. I’ve heard He restores. I believe God restores. But I have prayed a prayer for over three years now and it feels like my prayers get swallowed by the clouds. There’s a relationship I want in my life; there’s a boy I have wanted to be with for so long, but God seems to be hands off with this one request.
I know God redeems. I’ve seen him do it. My friend was only sober when he was asleep, and in a flash encounter with God, he was redeemed and changed. So why am I still praying the same prayer for my other friend when I know you can change them, spin the habit in a heartbeat?
I know God saves. He saved me. I was drowning in a storm, and He pulled me out of the water, and kept me afloat and now we are dancing on the waves with Him. But, I hear cries from others that I love. ‘When will it be my turn?’ and I feel guilty because you showed up for me and we all await patiently, or not patiently - nonetheless, we wait because we know God saves, So why isn't it happening. What do we do with the gap?
I know God cares, He does it every single day. He wakes me up with a song, and the sun, and delight, and He shows up for me and He says so in His word. So why do I still beg Him to care about this one thing in my life? I remember in 2020 screaming, ‘Do you not care I am dying?’ Even then there was an undeniable truth. God still cares. There's a gap, and I don't know how to ... fix it? Deal with it. Move from it.
I know God is in the works. I know God is always working and that He is in control of everything, and that I will never understand His works. But everything is spinning out of control, and I cannot help but think that He isn't holding it all together, even though I know He is. Why is there a gap? This is my God gap.
See the gap is about what you know of God and what you are experiencing of Him. Like knowing He loves, and feeling so unloved. Like knowing God is there, but feeling so alone and so lost. Knowing God is with you, but feeling neglected. Like knowing God chases people down but feeling like He’s taking a break with you. Like knowing He is the one that knocks on your door, and yet you still bang on His door wondering why He never answers.
That’s the gap - God how do we…how do we fix it?
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