Chemotherapy
And I watched the light slowly drain from your eyes.
Your life was filled with doctors, tears and a thousand 'you’ll get better soon.'
It was painful to watch you feel like you were dying from the very thing that meant to keep you alive.
Breathe harder
A light stays on the entire night.
There's a lamp by his bed.
Prayers to God are said.
The doctor rushed in,
"Keep him awake if you want him alive,"
"but mama, I am so tired, I want to sleep"
he says, and we break down.
I just want you to stay alive.
Just breathe harder.
I almost lost my brother that night
I guess what we almost lost, becomes a part loved by us deeply.
You can see it in how I love him.
I'll give him everything he needs, and wants, and over excessively provide any momentary memory of joy to fill up spaces in his mind.
You'll see it in how I love and cherish his voice.
You'll hear it in how I talk about him.
He'll always know he was loved, because he was almost lost.
I almost lost my brother that night, and my whole life changed.
A floating space
I floated and never wanted to come down.
They had just told you the news, and I was the one dying from the recent life change.
People will stare at us in that moment, and assume it was me with the news.
You were rock solid, strong and smiling at me, and I was floating.
I made a space in my mind, a space in the cloud where I could pause on the sadness.
Where I could pretend that when you broke the news to me on that bench, we were just making plans to go to the park.
There's a space in my mind where I float, above all the nightmares the world has brought to us.
Коментарі